DLee There's a simple reason why 2nd person isn't popular as the POV for fiction: it's hard to make it work. The fact that you make it work is admirable enough in itself. But what I like here is that this narrative probably wouldn't be as good told in first-person or third-person. You chose a situation that lends itself to this unusual form of story telling. I also like the use of outlandish humor and the present tense. If I came across a passage from this book, I would probably think, "Hey, this must be from Manor House." That's a good thing. Very few novels have an extremely distinctive style that's so easily spotted among the countless stacks of books out there.

ruggeri Yep! It works for me. I can't say I've ever read a 2nd person POV before, but it does work. I did one novel in 1st person present and found it very difficult at times, so i can appreciate the effort that goes into trying something new. I'm intrigued. You may be right indicating this is sort of Agatha Christie on steroids, but I've never been a Christie reader, now have i been a fan of the English "drawingroom" mysteries. I can't comment on that aspect of the work, but since the genre is new and different for me, I would like to continue with the story and find out what's going on. Couple of points: The clerk at Brown's description of the girl seems just a little too over-the-top. The narrator might talk that way, but not a clerk/ When it strikes the narrator that his Uncle might be his father, etc, I think we should learn a little more about the narrator's background. Who are his parents? A little genealogy here wouldn't hurt, especially since he's suddenly just learning about a mysterious relative who seems to be dropping from the family tree like a piece of rare fruit.

kimbra31 POV is certainly unique. I admire your style and vocabulary. (Affixed is so much more elegant than most of its synonyms.) More to the point, the experiment seems to work in this excerpt, at least in the view of this particular rat. I like the mystery of my dear departed uncle. I rather enjoyed the prospect of an inheritance, even if it is just a fiction. It drew me in and held me, although I would have been the first one to break the seal on the other envelope immediately after viewing the first letter and contents. I haven't read the other comments as of yet, so I don't know if this has been mentioned, but this reminds me a bit of an interactive computer game...Myst, for instance...with everything unfolding before me at the click of a mouse. Unlike Myst, however, I kept at it. I had a bit of difficulty with the sentence "None of the names is of anybody related to you that you know of." Just a sticking point, that's all. For the same reason (which I shall soon describe) I noted the sentence fragments, which can be perfectly acceptable in books and fiction. HOWEVER...your cultured prose sets its own tough standard, with the effect of causing the fragments to be more pronounced. Most of these could be integrated into preceding or succeeding phrases to counter what is (after all) only this reviewer's tiny complaint. Well done!